Marshall Rosenberg
Growing up as the offspring of a Jewish family, Marshall Rosenberg was confronted with various forms of violence from an early age. Experiencing how even someone’s last name could be the cause of violence, led him to explore the causes of violence; the desire to explore peaceful alternatives led him to study clinical psychology and he received his Ph.D. He developed the Nonviolent Communication process by linking violence with our way of thinking and speaking.
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Nonviolent Communication was first applied in 1960, by groups working on finding solutions for racism in public schools and other institutions in USA. Working in these projects, Dr. Rosenberg and his colleagues founded The Center for Nonviolent Communication (CNVC) in 1984, in order to spread Nonviolent Communication efficiently.
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Marshall Rosenberg’s team continues to offer Nonviolent Communication throughout the world with over 500 certified trainers. There also are hundreds of volunteers organizing seminars, workshops and study groups, joining practice groups and coordinating teams. Trainings are led in schools, work places, health institutions, jails, communities and families to resolve and prevent conflicts. Marshall Rosenberg’s companions continue to offer mediation service with Nonviolent Communication method in war inflicted zones such as Sierra Leone, Sri Lanka, Ruanda, Burundi, Bosnia, Serbia, Colombia and the Middle East.
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What disconnects us from our innate compassion and directs us towards violence and abuse? And on the contrary, what keeps some people connected to their natural compassion even in the most difficult circumstances?
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I would like us to create peace at three levels and have each of us know how to do it. First, within ourselves. That is to know how we can be peaceful with ourselves when we're less than perfect, for example. How we can learn from our limitations without blaming and punishing our self. If we can't do that, I'm not too optimistic how we're going to relate peacefully out in the world. Second, between people. Nonviolent Communication training shows people how to create peace within themselves and at the same time how to create connections with other people that allow compassionate giving to take place naturally. And third, in our social systems. To look out at the structures that we've created, the governmental structures and other structures, and to look at whether they support peaceful connections between us and if not, to transform those structures.
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Empathy is a respectful understanding of what others are experiencing. Often, instead of offering empathy, we have a strong urge to give advice or reassurance and to explain our own position or feeling. Yet empathy asks us to clear our mind and listen to others with our whole being.
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Please do as I requested, only if you can do so with the joy of a little child feeding a hungry duck. Please do not do as I request if there is any taint of fear of punishment if you don't. Please do not do as I request to buy my love, that is, hoping that I will love you more if you do. Please do not do as I request if you will feel guilty if you don't. Please do not do as I request if you will feel shameful. And certainly do not do as I request out of any sense of duty or obligation.